I apologise that the entry and the date no longer matches, yet it seems that
I have fallen asleep, and missed a day completely. And I didn't write on
5982101, fell asleep thru 5982102, and am writing this on 5982103.
The day before yesterday was quite eventful. I climbed up to the top of the
stairs, not once, or twice, but THREE times....to deliver the soup to the
captain. However, the rocking of the boat forced me to fall down, spilling
the soup twice all over me. So, then, after the third time, the captain came
out the door, it whapped me in the head, and i toubled, once more spilling
the soup. However, it was there, at the bottom of the stairs, that the
captain informed me that she wouldn't like to eat soup, and would much
rather have a pizza.
So I jumped out the boat, ran through the ministry office with soup dripping
all over me, and called dominos... They delievered, and I brought the
captain her pizza. Unfortunately, Papa John's being true to their annoying
commerical brought a pizza first, and they made it free, so now, I was 20
bucks short of ministry money, and had a nice warm pizza to waste.
So I climbed up to the lookout place of the ship, opened up Graham Crackers,
and read as I munched down the delicious pizza which had cost me quite alot,
due to all the extra toppings and the fact that I made them make it 20 times
larger than a regular pizza. The Papa John's Pizza was 40 times larger, and
I think they had some sort of conspiracy going on. Either way, it was a
pizza, and I was eating it.
After my lunch break, I walked into the ministry building still dressed in
my UKTO pirate garb, for a disscussion on the money problem. I sank in my
chair realising I'd spent the ministry's last 20 dollar bill, on a pizza,
which I ate myself.
Having eaten myself, I had to hire a dictator... the only thing remaining of
me was my mouth... (And this sentence is hard to type with your lips)
Zis is mr. hilter.. I schall be writing for the pirate who vas eaten.
I decided that my dictator wasn't working, and puked my fingers back up, to
type this sentence.
RIght, I apologise, as I seem to have gotten off on a grahamatical error and
taken it very literally, though I intend not to do that again.
The ministry meeting went as usual. Odd sorts of games being played, and odd
sorts of things not being worn...er I mean... being worn! Yes. That's it!
Having once again solved nothing at all, the minstry members satisfiedly
returned to where ever it was that they were... and did whatever it was that
they were doing before they were interuppted... Yet, the UKTO returned to
loony bits. All except for me. I had fallen asleep while gazing at a picture
of Graham. Not because I gazed at Graham...no no...but because I was tired,
and had been up since 4 am shining the Col's surprise birthday graham statue
--- which I'd forgotten to give to her nearly a week ago. I had remembered
to give her the congratulatory live organ transplant mold, after she'd won
the election for Captain.
I slept through the next day, as no one ever came in the meeting room, since
after all it was thursday and everybody was off doing something
educationally related, instead of skipping such an educationally boring day
to be at an non-educational-yet-rather-silly ministry meeting which was
nothing but boring to say the least.
Friday I awoke to the Col's humming of the legendary never before heard song
about a man who chose not to be a hurgle but a zinc oxide bicarbonate from
mars. Amazed by the song, I traveled off to a recording studio with Col, and
we recorded it. It was released as the first all humming record by two
loonies under POLLGE ever! And it skyrocketed to number 232910 on the
charts! An achievement no other member of the POLLGE campaign has ever
recieved.
Still dressed in my pirate garb, I sit in detention for sleeping too late
(this is NO excuse! And neither is blood an excuse for not swimming! Nope,
you could be spurting out blood all over the place and you still HAVE to
swim! its no excuse!) wondering....why on earth did I ever write this thing.
-Wappy